Najwa’s Point of View
Disappointment
I
can hardly breathe. I feel a throbbing pain at the back of my head. My mind is
a whirl of confusion. I have been pacing around the room for minutes now. I am
disappointed…disappointed with everyone! Mrs. Bola had given my position to
someone else and Anas have been mocking me in my face.
It’s no doubt that he
is happy I didn’t win the position but guess what? I’m still richer than him.
My best friend didn’t help matters yesterday. She actually walked into that
kitchen and made amala for Anas!
No one but Anas! She
was practically smiling as she watched him eat the food. What was the meaning
of that? Trying to please him? Isn’t she supposed to be by my side? If I hate
my husband, she has to hate him too. That’s
what friends are for!
I thrust my hand on the
sofa, furious because Anas spite me this morning. Yes, he wasn’t satisfied with
what he did yesterday. He had to tarnish my image in the presence of my
daughter!
“The food Auntie
Barakah made yesterday was really delicious. Mom doesn’t make food like this.
Why do we have to eat noodles every day?” Sahadat had asked avidly as she
poured milk into her bowl of cereal.
Anas made a burst of rich,
throaty laughter and ruffled her hair, eyeing me in mockery. “This is what
every mother is meant to do. Prepare good food for the family.” He had replied.
“So mom isn’t a good
mother?” Sahadat widened her eyes in shock.
“Is she?” he laughed
again and poured more cereal into her bowl.
He wasn’t satisfied
with mocking me and displaying his excitement over the news. He had to spoil me
in front of my daughter!
“Where’s this tie?”
Anas is muttering as he enters the room.
I hurry towards him and
grab the collar of his shirt fiercely.
“Whoa! Whoa! Not this
morning, Najwa. We can do this when we’ve returned from work. I have a meeting
with my boss this morning.” Anas is saying breathily with a look of haughty
disdain.
“Ehen…you want to progress in your career while you watch mine
crumble abi? It’s a lie…a big lie.
Now you want my only child to see me as a bad mother. I say you lie!” I yell at
his face.
Anas chuckles and
stares at me. “I lie? All I said is the truth and you know that. You might hide
your true self from the outside world but not from your family.”
Really?
He can talk? I need to pull him harder.
I grab his shirt with
all of my strength and pull him forward. Anas coughs and pushes me away, making
me land to the ground with a loud thud.
“You want to kill me?
You will not succeed.” He walks towards the wardrobe and I run after him, kneading
my sore hip.
“I will succeed oo. I will kill you in this house one
day. You are wicked and shameless. A good-for-nothing husband!” I jostle
towards the table and reach for my powder. Placing my palms over it, I hasten to
where he is standing and smudge his white shirt with the brown powder.
“You are crazy, Najwa.
Something is wrong with you!” he yells in rage as his eyes turn blood-shot.
“Yes, I don kolo. I have just started with you.” I
grab his collection of ties and dash to the bathroom as he takes off after me.
He is too late. I have
dipped them into the bucket of water before he enters the bathroom.
Drained in anger and
frustration, Anas covers his face with his trembling hands.
“I feel happy now.” I
grin as I scuttle out of the room.
Sahadat and I will
leave the house without him. After some hours, he can sort himself out and… will
be absent for his so-called meeting.
***
“You’re trying to tell
me that you hardly quarrel with your husband? How’s that possible?” the caller
with gravelly voice asks.
I try my best to
maintain composure as I smile and reply to his question. “It’s all about
understanding. When you love and understand yourselves, they’ll hardly be any
need for disagreement. You are one…like a person….” I say in a fake British
accent, remembering how I’d dealt with Anas this morning.
I wonder how he will
meet up with his meeting on time. The thought of him driving to work with a
frown makes my smile broader.
“But Najwa, how can
that be possible? You’re saying that you and your husband are always in good
terms?”
“Always in good terms,”
I reply confidently.
Can
someone put this caller out of the line before I do so myself?
“Okay. Thank you. Have
a nice day.”
“Bye, thanks for
calling…we’ll wrap the show here this morning. I’ll see you same time, same
station tomorrow. Have a great and fruitful day!” I wave my hands and smile at
the camera.
“Gosh!” I stand up and
walk out of the room, swearing loudly. I’m still angry and disappointed that I
didn’t get the position. I had strutted about the office yesterday, promising
to take my colleagues out for lunch. They’ll probably be mocking me!
“Oh, hey Najwa.”
Barakah comes closer, her satin skirt swaying and rustling. She stretches her
hands to embrace me but I decline, rolling my eyes at her.
“What happened?”
“You’re asking me? Were
you not the one taking care of that
man like you’re his wife?” I remark as I am walking to my office, Barakah
tailing behind me.
She chuckles. “As your
friend, I had to take care of your family since you were down. You don’t expect
me to sit down and watch them wail in hunger.”
I stare at her. Long
neck filled with hollows. Long legs like that of an antelope. I wish that I can
find her a man… or maybe find her a better job…
“I did the right thing,
Najwa.”
“You’re my best friend
and my enemy should be yours too. You have no right to smile at Anas.” I adjust
the hem of my chiffon blouse as I walk into my office. I take my seat and sip
from my cup of cold coffee.
“Okay. I promise to
never do that again. So, how are you holding up? Have you seen Mutmahinat
today?” Barakah asks, sitting in front of me.
At the sound of her name, my spine aches from within. I
grind my teeth and clench my fist. “That little pipsqueak? I haven’t seen her.”
“She was walking to
everyone’s table this morning. Greeting everyone and smiling graciously like
she’s a model for toothpaste advert.”
“What was she putting
on?” the last she will do is to compete with me in dressing.
“One yeye yellow skirt and a black T-shirt
that made her look like a toothpick. I did a little background check on her and
discovered that she is a divorcee with two children. Two boys!”
I spill coffee on my
blouse in bewilderment. Divorcee? Two
children? I stare at my computer and all I can see is her face.
“You should confront
her…threaten her. She took your place, Najwa. Fight for it!” Barakah motivates
me as she toys with the stapler on the table.
“You’re correct. Why
haven’t I thought of that?”
In the flash of a
minute, I am standing by Mutmahinat’s table in her office…I mean my office!
“To what do I owe this
pleasure ma’am?” she smiles at me.
Mutmahinat is undoubtedly
the most beautiful woman in the company. She has fair, glowing skin and her
face is always plastered with a smile.
“You took what belongs
to me and you won’t go scot-free. I will deal with you and make sure that I get
what is rightfully mine.” I say, irritably.
Mutmahinat smiles
mutinously. That smile, I wish that I can make it fade from her face. I wonder
how she is able to gain so much confidence. People get intimidated by me…but
she is different.
I think of what to get
her furious. “You cannot even manage your husband. He had to divorce you. How
can you manage our department?”
Mutmahinat’s face
suddenly creases into a frown. “You have to leave now. Please!” She says,
nettled.
“I’ll leave…but I’ve
said the truth. Tell Mr. Bola that you’re no longer interested.” I screech in
anger and storm out of her office.
I clean the beads of
sweat that have formed around my forehead with the sleeve of my blouse. “Mrs.
Najwa, I want to see you immediately.” Mrs. Bola suddenly appears in front of
me.
It isn’t up to five
minutes and Mutmahinat has reported me to Mrs. Bola? She’s just a timid woman.
I follow her grudgingly
to her office.
“Why did you threaten
Mutmahinat? Who said you deserve the position?”
“My TV show is the most
popular and I’ve been working effortlessly for years. How else do you expect me
to prove that I deserve the position?” I stare at Mrs. Bola’s face, filled with
an over-do of make-up.
She is pudgy, chocolate
complexion and always dressed in her usual shirt and palazzo pants…with a scarf
wrapped around her head. “I understand you but the management has a reason for
this. Mrs. Mutmahinat was intentionally brought here to head over the
department. You must accept your defeat and accept her as your boss. Also, you
shouldn’t use any word of threat on her anymore.”
“Okay,” I force the
word as I watch Mrs. Bola nod in appreciation.
***
I am walking out of the
building, planning on how to hug and kiss Anas without anyone noticing that
we’re acting. He’ll be very angry with me and I’m scared that he might not
return the gesture.
I flinch as my eyes
catch the usual spot where Anas always park the car. He is not alone. He is with
Mutmahinat. They are talking and laughing. What are they saying? What is Anas
thinking? Doesn’t he have an idea that she is my enemy and he is my husband?
I brace myself as I
walk towards the car. Mutmahinat is laughing at one of Anas’s joke…his dry
jokes I pretended was funny.
It is obvious that she
is trying to impress him!
“Asalamu ‘Alaykum. How
are you?” I grin maliciously and give Mutmahinat a dirty glare.
“I should be leaving
now. Bye, Anas.”
“Bye Mutmahinat.” He
smiles as he waves at her.
I try to control my
temper as I enter the car. “What was the meaning of that?”
“What? My new friend,
Mutmahinat?”
“Anas, you know this
lady is my sworn enemy and you made her your friend. Don’t you know that she’s
after me? First, she takes a position that’s rightfully mine and now, she’s
trying to seduce you because she believes that we’re in love.”
“You overthink things,
Najwa. Mutmahinat is harmless.” Anas insists as he takes a bottle of water
beside him and gulps it.
“Well…I’m sorry for
being a nuisance this morning. Did you meet up with your appointment?” I ask
with concerned eyes.
Anas and I may hate
ourselves…but we still care.
“There was snarled-up
traffic this morning. Luckily, I got in when the meeting was just about to
start. Sahadat’s teacher called this afternoon. Why couldn’t you be reached?”
My expression alters
completely from self-satisfied smugness to shock. “I switched off my phone.
What happened to my baby? Is she fine?”
“She is, now. She had a
running stomach…was purging repeatedly.”
I dab my eyes, careful
not to smudge my make-up. “It’s Barakah’s food that caused it. She isn’t used
to eating that.”
“That is because you do
not make it for her. Well, she’s fine now. She was taken to the sickbay.”
“Ahh…Alhamdulillah.” I cannot imagine anything bad happening to
Sahadat.
“My mom called. Zara’s
engagement is this weekend. We have to attend.”
“Okay,” I reply weakly,
wearing my seat-belt and wondering how Sahadat had faired all alone.
Oh la la
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written